At A Lose

I've been reading some of your blogs today and I agree. Things are So busy right now and my mind has silenced itself a bit.

Lance is still gone. My longing for him is almost overwhelming. I work (I cannot stand on my feet at the end of the day), bank, take care of the house, the dog, the cat, the kids, but it's all done with a sense of robotics. Even eating is difficult unless it is lunch break at work.

You would have to read some of my earlier posts to understand the depth of lose that I have lived through. Lance has completely and fully helped to heal the open wounds and fill my heart. Without him, my mind and body have difficulty... no my entire being wants to shut down. (I sob every time we hang up the phone.)

His absence has given me some time to reflect a bit though on many that I miss and feel I have lost touch with somewhat.

Jenn- I am So thankful God has come to you (Or that you were able to finally let him in) and that your Kingdom is good for you right now. I pray it never ends and this truly is your fairy tale. You deserve it. You certainly have been there for me and I will always love you.

MF- Are you okay? Our text messages have become fewer and fewer. I know this time of year sucks for you and I'm sorry. I think of Lynne every single day and the girls still pray to her every single night. I love you and I miss you.

SS- Your first Christmas. I'm sorry. Please know I will never forget Max.

JR- I miss you sometimes and think of you every single day. I will never forget everything you have taught me, done for me, and the moments we shared. I hope you are well.

My list could go on and on but those are the people that flood my mind daily, that I can't let go of and don't want to.

To everyone else: Love, prayers, and strength to you.

Please know that you too are on my mind and in my heart.